Still More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do

In the past, we would chronicle and discuss countless examples of drinkers OVER 21 behaving badly, as "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do".  Time to do it again:

In the past few months or so in America:

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash her car into a birthday party, killing two children. 

An underage drinker did NOT punch a flight attendant multiple times after drinking rum, causing the flight to divert, and then have the chutzpah to spit on and groin-kick the police officers who escorted him off the flight.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly BITE a flight attendant on an international flight, forcing the flight to divert.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly drive 105 mph with a BAC of 0.23 and crash into and kill another driver.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly drive in the wrong direction on I-95 and kill a young nursing student. 

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly steal a car and then crash it into two police cars.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly run over an elderly woman with a snowplow in a parking lot, killing her.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly bite the finger off of a wedding guest who tried to restrain him after he inappropriately touched another guest.

An underage drinker did NOT have the chutzpah to get herself arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct at an AA meeting of all places.  Not to be outdone in chutzpah, she kicked the police officers and added insult to injury by puking in the patrol car.

An underage drinker did NOT pull a gun on another parent at a youth football game because of something they said, then argued with police and threatened to kill the K9 too.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is just the tip of the iceberg...

UPDATE:  Also, an underage drinker did NOT drink so much that she drunkenly smashed her car into a crowd of 16 pedestrians crossing the street, injuring 14 and killing two of them, then left the scene of the crash until she was caught, all while pregnant. 

An underage drinker did NOT get so wasted that she grabbed an unrelated 10 year old boy in a Jersey Shore motel swimming pool and swung him around and dunked him underwater, then jumped on and inappropriately grabbed his father when he tried to intervene, and then became belligerent with police and proceeded to BITE one officer's hand as well.

Still More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do

In the past, we would chronicle and discuss countless examples of drinkers OVER 21 behaving badly, as "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do".  Time to do it again:

In the past few weeks or so in America:

An underage drinker did NOT so desperately want an encore of New Year's Eve the following day that she got drunk, drove, and flipped her car, wrapping it around a telephone pole, splitting it in half, on New Year's Day.  And then had the chutzpah to yell at hospital staff who treated her injuries afterwards!

An underage drinker did NOT get so wasted that she rear-ended another driver, killing him, and then kept obliviously driving and sideswiping other vehicles.  She was three times over the legal BAC limit.

An underage drinker did NOT cause Florida's very first fatal drunk driving crash of 2023.

An underage drinker did NOT drive obviously drunk, lead police on a high-speed chase, and then have the chutzpah to proceed to fight with the officer after being pulled over.  Being a football star does NOT make one immune from consequences!

An underage drinker did NOT get himself an aggravated DUI plus a bunch of other charges as well for his egregiously reckless drunk driving escapades and even trying to flee, all while on a suspended, revoked, expired, or non-existent license.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into another vehicle after blatantly driving the wrong direction on the highway.  But at least he was wearing a mask in his mugshot, albeit incorrectly, right? 

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into and injure three people while double the legal BAC limit and on a suspended license.

And underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash and injure himself and his three passengers, two of which were not yet legally old enough to drink.

An underage drinker did NOT get so extremely drunk that he passed out in Penn Station, and then had the chutzpah to assault the officers who roused him.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly pull out his gun and start shooting during an argument when a bystander made him pull over because he appeared to be driving drunk.  Guns and alcohol do NOT mix either!

An underage drinker did NOT drive drunk with his 2 year old daughter in his car, then assaulted a woman when she asked him to pull over so she could take the wheel.

An underage drinker did NOT drive nearly twice the legal BAC limit, with her young child in the car.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly hit his wife with a Christmas tree (!) after she asked him to help make dinner.   Yes, you read that correctly. 

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is just the tip of the iceberg....

More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do

In the past, we would chronicle countless examples of drinkers OVER 21 behaving badly, as "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do".  But we have clearly been slacking lately.  Time to do it again:

In the past few weeks or so in America:

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly wrap her car around a telephone pole--and set a terrible example as Assistant District Attorney.

An underage drinker did NOT literally get her SEVENTH DUI since 2007.  

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly assault an officer while being arrested for a wrong-way DUI.

An underage drinker did NOT get arrested for DUI while on the job--as a state trooper.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into and kill a 17 year old in another car, while another killed a 16 year old.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly ram his car into a police cruiser, with a BAC of a whopping 0.30%, nearly four times the legal limit.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into and kill a motorcyclist.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into and kill a sheriff's deputy. 

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly hold a razorblade to a woman's throat on an airplane.

An underage drinker did NOT have a drunken and violent meltdown on an airplane and try to fight off cops.

An underage drinker did NOT deliberately put alcohol in her baby's bottle, causing the baby to get sick.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is just the tip of the iceberg....

More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do

In the past, we would chronicle countless examples of drinkers OVER 21 behaving badly, as "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do".  But we have clearly been slacking lately.  Time to do it again:

In just the past few weeks or so in America:

An underage drinker did NOT get so incredibly wasted that she crashed her car into multiple barricades and then abandoned her six month old twin babies.  (Let me guess, she "misplaced" them.)

An underage drinker did NOT get another unrelated DUI just a few short months after a drunken (and cowardly) hit-and-run crash.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash her car into a utility pole and kill her 17 year old passenger despite being largely unscathed herself.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash his truck into and kill a beloved music teacher who just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly run over and kill an innocent 13 year old girl walking down the grass shoulder of the street, and then speed away and casually keep on driving to Taco Bell as if nothing had happened.  (Another cowardly hit-and-run.)

An underage drinker did NOT pound five shots of tequila in a row at a Las Vegas casino, get behind the wheel, and then drunkenly crash into an innocent family's car, tragically killing the father and seriously maiming his 3 year old son.  (Also a hit-and-run.)

An underage drinker did NOT have the chutzpah to drive himself to court drunk (!) to fight charges for his third DUI.  Literally the definition of chutzpah!

Nor did an underage drinker have the chutzpah to drunkenly drive his SUV to the car dealership with a missing tire, obvious damage, and smoke to try to SELL the very same vehicle that he had just drunkenly crashed into the median several times after downing four Four Loko cans (aka "blackout in a can") and chasing that with a can of White Claw.  His baseball star father must be so proud of him! NOT.

The recent epidemic of unruly airplane passengers, most of whom are over 21, has been greatly fueled by alcohol.  (Fortunately it seems to be declining now, since nearly two-thirds of the misbehavior was linked to the federal in-flight mask mandate that is no longer in effect now, and also thanks to the new FAA zero tolerance policy for misbehavior while flying.)

Alcohol-related deaths spiked during the pandemic, mainly among people OVER 21.  America was already drowning in the bottom of a bottle, and the pandemic and lockdowns were like gasoline on the fire.

And finally, it was just recently revealed that Rudy Giuliani, 78, the questionable advisor to Trump who advised him to prematurely and falsely declare victory over Biden in the 2020 election, and thereby promulgating the Big Lie that incited the Capitol insurrection riot on January 6, 2021, was most likely drunk when he dispensed his questionable advice.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg....

Dishonorable mentions outside the USA:

There was a 35 year old man in India who had meant to ritually sacrifice a goat, apparently got so wasted that he ended up inadvertently doing a HUMAN sacrifice of the person holding the goat.  Oops!

UPDATE:  But wait, there's more!

An underage drinker did NOT get in such a rage from being "mad at his girl" that he broke into the Dallas Museum of Art and wantonly destroyed $5 million worth of ancient art.  Just because, grrrr, he was pissed off! (No alcohol was mentioned in this case, but come on--when what the last time you heard of anyone of any age doing something like this sober?)

Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do

A few years ago, Twenty-One Debunked had a segment called "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do" (TUDDD), to highlight some off the outrageous misbehavior that over-21 drinkers have done recently.  We decided to bring it back.  In the past week or two:

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into a school bus in Massachusetts, injuring many adults and children.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly and belligerently threaten other passengers and crew on an airplane, causing the flight to be diverted.

An underage drinker did NOT kill one passenger and injure several others, including the other driver, in a DUI crash in Santa Ana, CA.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly run over a pedestrian in a parking lot with a pickup truck, landing her in the hospital.

An underage drinker did NOT kill both of his passengers in a DUI crash, himself walking away unscathed, in rural Mendocino County, CA.

An underage drinker did NOT get so incredibly wasted that she literally crashed into a house, injuring a child in that house.

An underage drinker did NOT get sloshed, tried to give her 10 year old daughter and 8 year old son bourbon, had stabby thoughts, asked her daughter to get a knife so they "would all die together", then grabbed and threw her son on the bed before she (luckily) passed out before anyone was killed.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.  But hey, at least they were over 21, right?  Move along, nothing to see here folks...

Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do (Part Six)

It's been a while since we posted a "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do" post, and after one of the biggest drinking days of the year, we felt that it was time to post a new one.

In the past few weeks or so:

An underage drinker did NOT kill his 9 year old nephew in a drunk driving crash.

An underage drinker did NOT rear-end a police car while driving drunk.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into a gas pump, causing it to burst into flames and injuring her passenger.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash his semi-truck into another person's car (and injuring her) after driving the wrong way.

An underage drinker did NOT injure a police officer and two children in a drunk driving crash.

An underage drinker did NOT run over and pin a pedestrian after drunkenly crashing into several cars and a stop sign--all in the same night.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into both a restaurant's fence AND a the front porch of a nearby house in the same night.

An underage drinker did NOT wrap her car around a telephone pole with a BAC of 0.223, breaking the pole in half, and then try to flee the scene--and this was her second DUI offense.  (Some people never learn)

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into two cars and a group of pedestrians while speeding, injuring five people and putting one in critical condition.

An underage drinker did not throw such a drunken fit in public that they needed 10-12 cop cars to come and arrest her for disorderly conduct.  All because the bartender wouldn't serve her anymore.

The cop that killed two people while speeding and driving with a BAC of double the legal limit was clearly over 21, since they generally don't allow anyone under 21 to become police officers.

An underage drinker did NOT have the chutzpah to sue his friend and Applebees for serving him the alcohol he drank on the night he drunkenly crashed into and killed two teenage girls.  (Another repeat offender, by the way)

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.

Still More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do (Part 5)

See previous posts as well.   It's been a while, and in the past few months or so:

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly drive her Mercedes-Benz through a 96 year old woman's house.

An underage drinker did NOT drive while drunk (and coked-up) and crash her Jeep, severely injuring her three kids and sending two elderly people in another car to the hospital.

An underage drinker did NOT drive drunk with her 2 year old daughter in tow, try to outrun the cops, and crash into a tree, all while pregnant.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into an AutoZone store and then attempt to speed off.

An underage drinker did NOT kill a 6 year old child in a crash after driving with a BAC of more than  double the legal limit.

An underage drinker did NOT injure a police officer by dragging him along the roadway while driving drunk.

An underage drinker did NOT steal an ambulance from a hospital and drunkenly crash it into two parked cars.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly strike a blind man in a crosswalk.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.

Still More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do (Part 4)

See previous posts. In the past week or so:

An underage drinker did NOT injure six innocent children at once while driving drunk.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly flip her vehicle with her 4 year old inside, fleeing the scene alone with the child still inside (while her other two kids were left home alone).

An underage drinker did NOT get in a drunken rage and rip the door off of a house and assault her boyfriend because he refused to have sex with her. (Yes, you read that correctly!)

An underage drinker did NOT go to a bar and start two separate fights--with his 9 month old baby in tow.

An underage drinking couple did NOT get sloshed at a Cleveland Browns game, get into a fight, and leave their 9 year old foster son with some strangers.

The presumably drunk homeless man who allegedly raped an elderly woman that was trying to help him was well over 21.

An underage drinker did NOT leave her 9 month old twin babies home alone in a playpen so she could go out on a drinking binge.

An underage drinker did NOT drive so wasted that he stopped at green lights and ran the red ones, and eventually killed an elderly man.

An underage drinker did NOT drive drunk and kill two pedestrians on a bridge.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.

Still More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do (Part 3)

See previous post.  In the past few weeks or so:

An underage drinker did NOT take two naked men hostage the morning after a night of forgotten drunken sexual activity "in case she was raped".

An underage drinker did NOT get sloshed and then get busted committing the apparent "crime" of "impersonating a stripper" at the local "gentleman's club".

An underage drinker did NOT get busted TWICE for DUI within a span of two days, with her kids in the car, after rear-ending another car on the road.

An underage drinker did NOT give his daughter a black eye and then drunkenly wreck his vehicle with his kids inside, abandoning it with the kids still inside, and then resist arrest when busted.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly rear-end another vehicle in his SUV while more than double the legal BAC limit, with his 5 year old son in the car with him.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly hit and injure a police bicycle officer with his van.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into a police cruiser and try to drive away.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly crash into and kill two people who were riding a motorcycle--but both of the victims were under 21, and thus never got a chance to drink legally.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.  Funny how what people over 21 do is their own business, but whatever an 18-20 year old does is used to justify abridging the civil rights of all 12 million 18-20 year olds. Honestly, does that really make any sense?

More Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do (Part 2)

See previous post.  This time, in the past few weeks or so:

An underage drinker did NOT beat his wife's head in with a rock in a drunken rage, killing her.

An underage drinker did NOT stomp his fiancee's Yorkshire terrier to death in a drunken rage.

An underage drinker did NOT get so wasted he thought it was a good idea to let his 8 year old son drive instead--but then again, at least his son was (hopefully) sober.

The cop who got a DUI while pulling a DARE trailer, of all things, was well over 21.

An underage drinker did NOT force a 40-ounce bottle of beer on her 4 year old son and give her 10 month old daughter a baby bottle that likely contained booze.

An underage drinker did NOT kill five Amish people when he drunkenly sideswiped a van.

An underage drinker did NOT get passed-out drunk in his filthy trailer while his 18 month old son (you read that right) was left outside to drink from open beer bottles scattered about on the porch.

An underage drinker did NOT cause a three-vehicle crash that sent a bus colliding into a McDonalds.

An underage drinker did NOT cause a six-car pile-up when he drunkenly crashed his semi-truck on the highway.

An underage drinker did NOT put a career Marine on life support after drunkenly crashing into him.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.

Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do (Part 1)

Dave Hitt has a great website, Quick Hitts, with a section titled, "Things Atheists Didn't Do."  It is a list of recent, high-profile cases of the crimes, follies, and misadventures of religious fanatics.  We at Twenty-One Debunked have decided to do something similar.  From time to time, we will post "Things Underage Drinkers Didn't Do", a (partial) list of all the high-profile drunken crimes, follies, and misadventures involving people age 21 and over during the past week or so.  Every case we list occurred in the USA or one of the few other countries where the drinking age is 21, and nearly all cases have no mention of other substances involved.  All suspects are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.

PART ONE

An underage drinker did NOT "misplace" his baby on the sidewalk after drinking.

An underage drinker did NOT get naked and take a dump in his neighbor's garage.

An underage drinker did NOT kill her teenage son in a drunk-driving crash.

An underage drinker did NOT try to kidnap two teenage girls like this creep did.

An underage drinker did NOT need to be tasered after drunkenly killing a young man and injuring another at 100 mph.

An underage drinker did NOT leave her 3 year old son alone at the pool to get beer money so she could get wasted.

An underage drinker did NOT possibly set a new record for Georgia's highest BAC level (FIVE TIMES the legal limit!) while driving with one's kids in the car in broad daylight.

An underage drinker did NOT drunkenly drive her SUV and smash into a fire station, injuring her teenage daughter who was riding with her.

An underage drinker did NOT get so incredibly wasted that he was completely oblivious that the pedestrian he hit while driving drunk (and landed inside his car) was dead.

An underage drinker did NOT kill a Red Cross volunteer in a drunk-driving crash.

An underage drinker did NOT kill his passenger when he drunkenly sideswiped a train.

The Melrose Place actress who allegedly drove drunk and killed an (almost) elderly New Jersey woman and actually had the audacity to laugh afterwards was well over 21.

Also, none of the police officers recently busted for DUI (one of which drove with his 3 year old son) were underage either.

And that, my friends, is just the tip of the iceberg.